A reply to a vitriolic blogger with an obvious ax to grind...
It is VERY rare that I place myself in a position like this...but as I wrote a few years ago...I know what it is to be bullied and frankly...I hate bullies.
The below article was posted on Saturday July 18, 2015 by a man who goes by "Davy V." I went to his blogger page and saw his only other blog with content is called "Rochester, NY Police Department Exposed!". This 'amateur Woodward' (as I have taken to calling him) capped off his latest post from September outlining the death of Officer Pierson with "Perhaps now, the Rochester, NY Police department, including the 7 trigger-happy cops who executed Izzy Andino, are feeling the pain of losing a loved one."...only to be followed with "The Rochester, NY Police department's Tactical Unit (ed: Which was Pierson's unit) is the most corrupt division within the RPD." I say this to set perspective because this blogger has decided that now...Officer Pierson needs to be defended. That even though he served with what this "activist" says is a department that has been "executing innocent civilians"...his memory deserves to be defended.
So now I post a link to this person's article for your perusal. On his main blog Mr. V has decided to chime in on the 'scandal' involving Officer Pierson's widow and her being with child. Here's the link:
http://davyv.blogspot.com/2015/07/just-10-months-after-rochester-ny.html
I read the entire piece...and I had to write something because I couldn't BELIEVE what I was reading.
Here's an opinion piece...about a policeman's widow...who has experienced the worst fear every cop's wife has...and come through it. She's had the condolences of men in dress uniform speaking at her while she cries. She's heard the sound of bagpipes being played. She's had to endure the public funeral, the public support and the public scrutiny...while everyday coming home, shutting the front door and while we all get to go on with our lives and loves...she has to raise children, mourn a loss and figure next steps...all while also dealing with the hard gaze of public and private scrutiny.
I read this piece...and the comments on it and all I could think was "what in the hell gives US the right to judge this woman?" I read comments from angry citizens who can't believe this woman would dare to become pregnant so soon and after receiving (freely given) gifts from the public. I read comments from people who felt (as I do) that we can't know what it's like...so give the benefit of the doubt. I also read comments from those who feel that we should know that their mother made 2400 dollars a day by just going to this website and signing up to send emails to various people saying that they're a Nigerian prince who wants to hide some money in the bank accounts of CRRAAAZYYY Americans. It takes all kinds to move the needle...and that seems to be what this "reporter" was setting out to do.
I want to say that from where I stand we as a community and as a recipient of the sacrifice made by Officer Pierson...we should all collectively mind our own business.
What happened to Officer Pierson was tragic. It was awful...but justice is being done. The perpetrator has been LWOP'ped BIG time. (Life without possibility of parole)...(Ok...the reference MAY have come from a Batman comic and no one MAY use that in vernacular speech...but it's my blog...so...yeah. I get to. ). He's going away and not coming back. 10 months of case building, pre-trial and trial and sentencing are through and it's time for US to go back to living OUR lives. Never mind...that for the most part we all started doing that 2 months after the shooting. Amy Pierson became a face we saw at events...someone the news checked in with from time to time (as it should be) and just another member of the community. In public she was poised, appropriate and sincere. Just what we in the collective zeitgeist of Rochester wanted to see.
You know though...this woman GETS to have a private life. Gets to have a private hell. She's allowed to not be OK with raising her kids alone. While we all went home to our families after this fell out of the news cycle...Amy was still in the thick of it. Feeling the loss of a husband, a partner and father. So few of us at this age know that loss intimately. Our parents probably know it by now (my father sure does)...but for the most part, those of us in our 20's - 40's haven't experienced the loss of a spouse. We don't know what that does. To be still vibrant, relevant and YES...attractive but feel abandoned by our loved one who died through no fault of their own. Even worse...when you realize Office Pierson CHOSE this life. That no doubt...he and his wife discussed this eventuality...and though they could never prepare for it...I'm sure Amy felt like she has to show that she's OK...even though I'd not be surprised to hear she was angry at her husband...for making that split second decision to chase this man down. It's justifiable...and understandable. I'm not saying that IS what she is feeling by the way because I haven't spoken to her. I know friends of hers...but never had the pleasure or privilege of meeting her.
I say all this because now...this woman has moved on with a new man...and yes...gotten pregnant...out of wedlock...only 10 months after the death of her husband.
There seem to be those that seem offended by this. They ask how could she do this? They say her husband hasn't been gone a year and that she should have waited so that WE as a community could feel better about it. They ask now about the gifts and money and seem to suggest that Mrs. Pierson taking those gifts (again...freely given and unasked for) had entered into some sort of agreement with the community to allow us to dictate when, how and who she gets to share her life and bed with.
That to me is the worst of this.
Which brings me to the "article" written by Mr. V.
As an amateur writer...I do know I love when something I wrote gets attention. When I get "likes" or comments saying I have a gift or I should do more...it does stroke my ego. I mean come on...I just said I've never met Mrs. Pierson, I don't live in the city borders and yet here I am chiming in on the topic. Of course I'd love this to go viral and take the world by storm. To be interviewed by both Wease and Lonsberry in a massive media event that would make Lebron James' 'choice' event of years ago look small. To be welcomed into the White House and given the 'Football' for a day and told I could play REAL battleship with the Fifth Atlantic Fleet and to be interviewed by Don Alhart as "Today's bright spot shining on a local blogger who stood up to a bully." Who wouldn't love all of that?
Saying that I can see where Mr. V may have wanted to 'move the needle' a bit. However the 'piece' he wrote is in my opinion; is full of more hearsay, innuendo and downright misinformation than a news report by Brian Williams on what it was like when he got to actually be guitar tech for Jimi Hendrix during the original Woodstock.
Mr. V in his piece seems to insinuate many things...and all without any shred of evidence that he will show...only what has been told to him. He suggests:
A: That Mrs. Pierson sought the community's help in raising funds for her.
B: That Mrs. Pierson had been involved in an illicit affair with the father of the child she's carrying since before last September (when her husband died).
C: That Mrs. Pierson "totally duped" the Rochester community and "took the money and ran".
D: That the Rochester News Media is to blame partially because a young white cop's widow equals ratings.
Mr. V goes on to state that Mrs. Pierson as a 'public figure' should "not expect any privacy".
I want to respond to that assertion first.
Mr. V...you're obviously an activist who feels that the RPD has wronged you in some way. That what they do is evil and they need to be stopped. Ok. I get it. You're entitled to your opinion. However...let me say this. You're flat out 100% wrong. Amy Pierson is a public figure because of the media. That's true. She neither was elected nor asked to serve in a public capacity. She's not an actress, songwriter, musician or other person who's works are put out for public dissemination. She has a Facebook...but so does my dead mother...so that means nothing. Amy Pierson did one thing to thrust her into the spotlight. When Officer Pierson was down on one knee holding a ring of gold up to her...she said YES. That's it. Something billions of women have done through the ages. She neither asked for nor sought out fame, fortune or donations from this community. We gave to her. We saw her tears, we felt her pain and we honored the sacrifice of a man who would have taken a bullet EVEN for a cop-hating self-important blogger to save that life. Officer Pierson or any other cop...would defend your life with theirs if needed. He fulfilled the ultimate duty of an officer...and we as a community RALLIED behind this woman and her family. How dare you sully that with your innuendo and your cheap 'journalism'. Money isn't the issue here...or if it is...then the blame is on us.
A gift not freely given...isn't a gift. It's a contract. At no point should anyone who donated anything to this widow have expected her to all of a sudden not need to feel loved, desired or cared for. At no point should we have expected this woman to become a nun devoted to her children only and to live her life pining for the lost love of her youth. At no point should we have expected her NOT to move on with someone and especially at no point should we have expected her to ask OUR permission to begin dating (which I will grant you Mr.V...is a supposition on my part of an expectation YOU have from reading your post). It's none of our business how this women spent the money she was given. It was a GIFT. A way of saying "Thank you for sacrificing your husband for our community."
In regards to the possibility that this woman was involved with this man before the death of her husband. I'll say this...again...none of our business. I imagine that being a police officer stresses a marriage. That a bad day at the office for me...isn't a 10th of what a bad day in the office is for a cop. I have no doubt there are instances of PTSD, adrenaline junkies and other issues that could cause either part of a marriage to stray. I'm not justifying any action here...but saying I could understand it. However...again...it's not our business. What's great about this country is that (it used to be anyway)...when a cop took off the badge and uniform...they got to blend in. They become a normal citizen again. Yes...there is a change in this country toward holding people accountable for private statements professionally...and I for one find it galling. I don't care if a cop is a racist, a sex fiend or an asshole. I just care that everyday...they show up to work and make our lives better...so long as their private views go away when the uniform comes on (and most cops I know...do exactly that).
So Amy Pierson MAY have been involved with this man. Ok. That sucks...but none of us know what the marriage was like. I also can assure you...that no matter what affairs or issues they had...that the emotions that woman had when the news came to her was genuine and real. In fact...I'd wager the only 'fake' thing she did...was compose herself with poise and dignity in public when all she probably wanted to do every time she had to stand at some event...was lose her crap. As a man who is divorced after 10 years of marriage, and not close with his ex (as we have no children etc)...I know that if I found out she was killed...my heart would burst open with emotion. No matter what's happened...she will always be my first wife and a member of my family. While I don't love her as I once did...I love her still to this day...and the news that she was gone from this Earth would impact me DEEPLY. In fact...I have no doubt that if Amy had been unfaithful to her husband...that that only made the emotional impact, the pain, the loss be compounded by the guilt she felt at not maintaining the vows she gave. That to me seems punishment enough and again...not our business.
This brings me finally to Mr. V. A man who has blogged about the incredible evil of the RPD...who obviously has a desire to see this organization brought low and to have oversight applied in such a way as to make what they do impossible. A man with an ax to grind and an audience who listens. A man who while condemning a 20-something widow to being a woman seeking financial wealth by donations while on his blog with over a million views...has a Paypal "Donate" button is the first color you see on a black page with white lettering (which serves to accentuate it). A man who condemns a woman as a cheating spouse with only hearsay and anonymous sources, who coincidentally seem to share the same view as him. This man seeks to condemn this woman. I ask you sir...who are you? What have you done in your life? Have you ever made a mistake? Have you ever hurt a loved one? Have you cheated on a lover/spouse? You have an issue with the RPD. Your blogs and viewpoints are full of vitriol and disdain for the institution. You insinuate in your blog about Officer Pierson from last year...that he got what he deserved because he worked for this tac team. So then why now do you condemn this woman who probably caused pain and suffering to that officer if what you say is true? Where do YOU get off? You've taken your side. You stand against the police department. This woman...may have emotionally HURT a member of that department. Wouldn't your stance be more of one of understanding and using her 'dalliance' as a means of showing that the RPD is evil not only as an institution...but drives their wives to become cheaters? Oh wait...you did that already in an article you cite in this post...and got hate mail for it. Ahhhh OK. So this is your next attempt? Shame on you sir. You're using the death of a PERSON...the loss of a FAMILY for your own political and (probably...since you have a Donate button) financial gain. What kind of man does that?
In my opinion...you're a bully sir. I feel bad for you...and pity you. I've had a hell in my life the last three years...and I've said HATEFUL hurtful things about friends and people I've loved...but I knew it was wrong and I've tried to make amends. You sir...you use events involving REAL people...and try to stir up some sort of political firestorm...where you hopefully get to be the center of attention. Why else would you write this as you did? Officer Pierson is a regular man who did an AMAZING thing. He is now sainted in the eyes of Rochester. However in this new age of social media and awareness...we as a culture and society have begun to be uncomfortable with the idea of a true hero. We can't fathom that someone can be that sacrificial...so we have to find out the dirt. We have to find a way to humanize them and bring them off the pedestal we ourselves put them on. We as a culture are fickle and sad. We want heroes...but we want them to know when to go away or we'll find a way to MAKE them go away. With his sacrifice, Officer Pierson became a hero that we put on that pedestal of public awe. We looked at the shiny visage of it...but now it's time to scuff the luster a bit. In this case though, like the quarterback of the football team on prom night who only got to third base with the cheerleader before she remembered her virtues...we as a culture feel 'blue balled' because we can't tear this hero down. His sacrifice is a TRUE act of heroism...and there's no way we can scuff that luster. So instead...we can tear down his widow. We can bring the hard light of scrutiny to their marriage, family and her life now. We can call into question HER virtue and her dedication. We do that because in the back of our heads...we know that marriage is supposed to make a man and woman one flesh...and so by nailing her..we get to nail him by proxy. After all..it takes two to ruin a marriage and if she's cheating...HE must not have been doing something right. There's the scuff we need. Ahhhh...we get to go back to feeling ok about ourselves...because equality means heroes don't exist. Phew.
I think we should leave this woman alone. We as a community and city thank you ma'am for your sacrifice. Even if the only thing she sacrificed was a trip to divorce court...she lost the father to her children. She's now going to be raising the children of TWO men...and yes...statistics say that if she DID cheat on her husband and especially with this man...that the odds are against their long term happiness. He is most likely her 'rebound'...and their love will be a tough mountain to climb as trust issues would no doubt intrude...let alone the issues of being the man married to the wife of this city's greatest hero. It's another stress on a relationship.
Finally...to those who'd condemn her for the baby being out of wedlock. I'll ask this question. If she said even 3 months ago...that she wanted to get married to THIS man...how would we react? Wouldn't the public scrutiny turn to her? Wouldn't we say it's too soon and what kind of woman does that? I can understand that she may have needed physical comfort right now...and I can understand that she may have even desired to marry this man...but knew that it would cause a firestorm and sully the memory of her husband in this town. I choose to think that would be the reason...because it means she DOES care about our feelings about his sacrifice. It's the best reason...it's the happiest...and a bit sappy. Then again...I still get choked up at the end of "Never Been Kissed" when Michael Vaughn comes down and kisses Gertie on the pitcher's mound...so I guess I'm a sap.
Thanks for Reading.
The below article was posted on Saturday July 18, 2015 by a man who goes by "Davy V." I went to his blogger page and saw his only other blog with content is called "Rochester, NY Police Department Exposed!". This 'amateur Woodward' (as I have taken to calling him) capped off his latest post from September outlining the death of Officer Pierson with "Perhaps now, the Rochester, NY Police department, including the 7 trigger-happy cops who executed Izzy Andino, are feeling the pain of losing a loved one."...only to be followed with "The Rochester, NY Police department's Tactical Unit (ed: Which was Pierson's unit) is the most corrupt division within the RPD." I say this to set perspective because this blogger has decided that now...Officer Pierson needs to be defended. That even though he served with what this "activist" says is a department that has been "executing innocent civilians"...his memory deserves to be defended.
So now I post a link to this person's article for your perusal. On his main blog Mr. V has decided to chime in on the 'scandal' involving Officer Pierson's widow and her being with child. Here's the link:
http://davyv.blogspot.com/2015/07/just-10-months-after-rochester-ny.html
I read the entire piece...and I had to write something because I couldn't BELIEVE what I was reading.
Here's an opinion piece...about a policeman's widow...who has experienced the worst fear every cop's wife has...and come through it. She's had the condolences of men in dress uniform speaking at her while she cries. She's heard the sound of bagpipes being played. She's had to endure the public funeral, the public support and the public scrutiny...while everyday coming home, shutting the front door and while we all get to go on with our lives and loves...she has to raise children, mourn a loss and figure next steps...all while also dealing with the hard gaze of public and private scrutiny.
I read this piece...and the comments on it and all I could think was "what in the hell gives US the right to judge this woman?" I read comments from angry citizens who can't believe this woman would dare to become pregnant so soon and after receiving (freely given) gifts from the public. I read comments from people who felt (as I do) that we can't know what it's like...so give the benefit of the doubt. I also read comments from those who feel that we should know that their mother made 2400 dollars a day by just going to this website and signing up to send emails to various people saying that they're a Nigerian prince who wants to hide some money in the bank accounts of CRRAAAZYYY Americans. It takes all kinds to move the needle...and that seems to be what this "reporter" was setting out to do.
I want to say that from where I stand we as a community and as a recipient of the sacrifice made by Officer Pierson...we should all collectively mind our own business.
What happened to Officer Pierson was tragic. It was awful...but justice is being done. The perpetrator has been LWOP'ped BIG time. (Life without possibility of parole)...(Ok...the reference MAY have come from a Batman comic and no one MAY use that in vernacular speech...but it's my blog...so...yeah. I get to. ). He's going away and not coming back. 10 months of case building, pre-trial and trial and sentencing are through and it's time for US to go back to living OUR lives. Never mind...that for the most part we all started doing that 2 months after the shooting. Amy Pierson became a face we saw at events...someone the news checked in with from time to time (as it should be) and just another member of the community. In public she was poised, appropriate and sincere. Just what we in the collective zeitgeist of Rochester wanted to see.
You know though...this woman GETS to have a private life. Gets to have a private hell. She's allowed to not be OK with raising her kids alone. While we all went home to our families after this fell out of the news cycle...Amy was still in the thick of it. Feeling the loss of a husband, a partner and father. So few of us at this age know that loss intimately. Our parents probably know it by now (my father sure does)...but for the most part, those of us in our 20's - 40's haven't experienced the loss of a spouse. We don't know what that does. To be still vibrant, relevant and YES...attractive but feel abandoned by our loved one who died through no fault of their own. Even worse...when you realize Office Pierson CHOSE this life. That no doubt...he and his wife discussed this eventuality...and though they could never prepare for it...I'm sure Amy felt like she has to show that she's OK...even though I'd not be surprised to hear she was angry at her husband...for making that split second decision to chase this man down. It's justifiable...and understandable. I'm not saying that IS what she is feeling by the way because I haven't spoken to her. I know friends of hers...but never had the pleasure or privilege of meeting her.
I say all this because now...this woman has moved on with a new man...and yes...gotten pregnant...out of wedlock...only 10 months after the death of her husband.
There seem to be those that seem offended by this. They ask how could she do this? They say her husband hasn't been gone a year and that she should have waited so that WE as a community could feel better about it. They ask now about the gifts and money and seem to suggest that Mrs. Pierson taking those gifts (again...freely given and unasked for) had entered into some sort of agreement with the community to allow us to dictate when, how and who she gets to share her life and bed with.
That to me is the worst of this.
Which brings me to the "article" written by Mr. V.
As an amateur writer...I do know I love when something I wrote gets attention. When I get "likes" or comments saying I have a gift or I should do more...it does stroke my ego. I mean come on...I just said I've never met Mrs. Pierson, I don't live in the city borders and yet here I am chiming in on the topic. Of course I'd love this to go viral and take the world by storm. To be interviewed by both Wease and Lonsberry in a massive media event that would make Lebron James' 'choice' event of years ago look small. To be welcomed into the White House and given the 'Football' for a day and told I could play REAL battleship with the Fifth Atlantic Fleet and to be interviewed by Don Alhart as "Today's bright spot shining on a local blogger who stood up to a bully." Who wouldn't love all of that?
Saying that I can see where Mr. V may have wanted to 'move the needle' a bit. However the 'piece' he wrote is in my opinion; is full of more hearsay, innuendo and downright misinformation than a news report by Brian Williams on what it was like when he got to actually be guitar tech for Jimi Hendrix during the original Woodstock.
Mr. V in his piece seems to insinuate many things...and all without any shred of evidence that he will show...only what has been told to him. He suggests:
A: That Mrs. Pierson sought the community's help in raising funds for her.
B: That Mrs. Pierson had been involved in an illicit affair with the father of the child she's carrying since before last September (when her husband died).
C: That Mrs. Pierson "totally duped" the Rochester community and "took the money and ran".
D: That the Rochester News Media is to blame partially because a young white cop's widow equals ratings.
Mr. V goes on to state that Mrs. Pierson as a 'public figure' should "not expect any privacy".
I want to respond to that assertion first.
Mr. V...you're obviously an activist who feels that the RPD has wronged you in some way. That what they do is evil and they need to be stopped. Ok. I get it. You're entitled to your opinion. However...let me say this. You're flat out 100% wrong. Amy Pierson is a public figure because of the media. That's true. She neither was elected nor asked to serve in a public capacity. She's not an actress, songwriter, musician or other person who's works are put out for public dissemination. She has a Facebook...but so does my dead mother...so that means nothing. Amy Pierson did one thing to thrust her into the spotlight. When Officer Pierson was down on one knee holding a ring of gold up to her...she said YES. That's it. Something billions of women have done through the ages. She neither asked for nor sought out fame, fortune or donations from this community. We gave to her. We saw her tears, we felt her pain and we honored the sacrifice of a man who would have taken a bullet EVEN for a cop-hating self-important blogger to save that life. Officer Pierson or any other cop...would defend your life with theirs if needed. He fulfilled the ultimate duty of an officer...and we as a community RALLIED behind this woman and her family. How dare you sully that with your innuendo and your cheap 'journalism'. Money isn't the issue here...or if it is...then the blame is on us.
A gift not freely given...isn't a gift. It's a contract. At no point should anyone who donated anything to this widow have expected her to all of a sudden not need to feel loved, desired or cared for. At no point should we have expected this woman to become a nun devoted to her children only and to live her life pining for the lost love of her youth. At no point should we have expected her NOT to move on with someone and especially at no point should we have expected her to ask OUR permission to begin dating (which I will grant you Mr.V...is a supposition on my part of an expectation YOU have from reading your post). It's none of our business how this women spent the money she was given. It was a GIFT. A way of saying "Thank you for sacrificing your husband for our community."
In regards to the possibility that this woman was involved with this man before the death of her husband. I'll say this...again...none of our business. I imagine that being a police officer stresses a marriage. That a bad day at the office for me...isn't a 10th of what a bad day in the office is for a cop. I have no doubt there are instances of PTSD, adrenaline junkies and other issues that could cause either part of a marriage to stray. I'm not justifying any action here...but saying I could understand it. However...again...it's not our business. What's great about this country is that (it used to be anyway)...when a cop took off the badge and uniform...they got to blend in. They become a normal citizen again. Yes...there is a change in this country toward holding people accountable for private statements professionally...and I for one find it galling. I don't care if a cop is a racist, a sex fiend or an asshole. I just care that everyday...they show up to work and make our lives better...so long as their private views go away when the uniform comes on (and most cops I know...do exactly that).
So Amy Pierson MAY have been involved with this man. Ok. That sucks...but none of us know what the marriage was like. I also can assure you...that no matter what affairs or issues they had...that the emotions that woman had when the news came to her was genuine and real. In fact...I'd wager the only 'fake' thing she did...was compose herself with poise and dignity in public when all she probably wanted to do every time she had to stand at some event...was lose her crap. As a man who is divorced after 10 years of marriage, and not close with his ex (as we have no children etc)...I know that if I found out she was killed...my heart would burst open with emotion. No matter what's happened...she will always be my first wife and a member of my family. While I don't love her as I once did...I love her still to this day...and the news that she was gone from this Earth would impact me DEEPLY. In fact...I have no doubt that if Amy had been unfaithful to her husband...that that only made the emotional impact, the pain, the loss be compounded by the guilt she felt at not maintaining the vows she gave. That to me seems punishment enough and again...not our business.
This brings me finally to Mr. V. A man who has blogged about the incredible evil of the RPD...who obviously has a desire to see this organization brought low and to have oversight applied in such a way as to make what they do impossible. A man with an ax to grind and an audience who listens. A man who while condemning a 20-something widow to being a woman seeking financial wealth by donations while on his blog with over a million views...has a Paypal "Donate" button is the first color you see on a black page with white lettering (which serves to accentuate it). A man who condemns a woman as a cheating spouse with only hearsay and anonymous sources, who coincidentally seem to share the same view as him. This man seeks to condemn this woman. I ask you sir...who are you? What have you done in your life? Have you ever made a mistake? Have you ever hurt a loved one? Have you cheated on a lover/spouse? You have an issue with the RPD. Your blogs and viewpoints are full of vitriol and disdain for the institution. You insinuate in your blog about Officer Pierson from last year...that he got what he deserved because he worked for this tac team. So then why now do you condemn this woman who probably caused pain and suffering to that officer if what you say is true? Where do YOU get off? You've taken your side. You stand against the police department. This woman...may have emotionally HURT a member of that department. Wouldn't your stance be more of one of understanding and using her 'dalliance' as a means of showing that the RPD is evil not only as an institution...but drives their wives to become cheaters? Oh wait...you did that already in an article you cite in this post...and got hate mail for it. Ahhhh OK. So this is your next attempt? Shame on you sir. You're using the death of a PERSON...the loss of a FAMILY for your own political and (probably...since you have a Donate button) financial gain. What kind of man does that?
In my opinion...you're a bully sir. I feel bad for you...and pity you. I've had a hell in my life the last three years...and I've said HATEFUL hurtful things about friends and people I've loved...but I knew it was wrong and I've tried to make amends. You sir...you use events involving REAL people...and try to stir up some sort of political firestorm...where you hopefully get to be the center of attention. Why else would you write this as you did? Officer Pierson is a regular man who did an AMAZING thing. He is now sainted in the eyes of Rochester. However in this new age of social media and awareness...we as a culture and society have begun to be uncomfortable with the idea of a true hero. We can't fathom that someone can be that sacrificial...so we have to find out the dirt. We have to find a way to humanize them and bring them off the pedestal we ourselves put them on. We as a culture are fickle and sad. We want heroes...but we want them to know when to go away or we'll find a way to MAKE them go away. With his sacrifice, Officer Pierson became a hero that we put on that pedestal of public awe. We looked at the shiny visage of it...but now it's time to scuff the luster a bit. In this case though, like the quarterback of the football team on prom night who only got to third base with the cheerleader before she remembered her virtues...we as a culture feel 'blue balled' because we can't tear this hero down. His sacrifice is a TRUE act of heroism...and there's no way we can scuff that luster. So instead...we can tear down his widow. We can bring the hard light of scrutiny to their marriage, family and her life now. We can call into question HER virtue and her dedication. We do that because in the back of our heads...we know that marriage is supposed to make a man and woman one flesh...and so by nailing her..we get to nail him by proxy. After all..it takes two to ruin a marriage and if she's cheating...HE must not have been doing something right. There's the scuff we need. Ahhhh...we get to go back to feeling ok about ourselves...because equality means heroes don't exist. Phew.
I think we should leave this woman alone. We as a community and city thank you ma'am for your sacrifice. Even if the only thing she sacrificed was a trip to divorce court...she lost the father to her children. She's now going to be raising the children of TWO men...and yes...statistics say that if she DID cheat on her husband and especially with this man...that the odds are against their long term happiness. He is most likely her 'rebound'...and their love will be a tough mountain to climb as trust issues would no doubt intrude...let alone the issues of being the man married to the wife of this city's greatest hero. It's another stress on a relationship.
Finally...to those who'd condemn her for the baby being out of wedlock. I'll ask this question. If she said even 3 months ago...that she wanted to get married to THIS man...how would we react? Wouldn't the public scrutiny turn to her? Wouldn't we say it's too soon and what kind of woman does that? I can understand that she may have needed physical comfort right now...and I can understand that she may have even desired to marry this man...but knew that it would cause a firestorm and sully the memory of her husband in this town. I choose to think that would be the reason...because it means she DOES care about our feelings about his sacrifice. It's the best reason...it's the happiest...and a bit sappy. Then again...I still get choked up at the end of "Never Been Kissed" when Michael Vaughn comes down and kisses Gertie on the pitcher's mound...so I guess I'm a sap.
Thanks for Reading.
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